Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Being Okay With That Person

I woke this morning thinking about a conversation that I had yesterday while on the phone with my sister. We were walking and talking. It's how we do. I was telling Jenny my older sister that I heard a wise woman once say,  "You will spend half your life finding out who you are, and the other half being okay with that person."  I totally agree with this statement, and would say that I am almost to the other side of it. Almost being the operative word in that sentence. I feel everyday as I inch closer and closer to my forties a certain calm come over me.  It's not that I feel I was totally obsessed with what other people thought, but I was totally obsessed with what other people thought. 

As I've gotten older and had many a conversation with The Lover of My Soul, and My Giant about this I have realized that in my lifetime I think I have spent more time wondering and worrying what others are thinking, than I have spent having my own thoughts. 

That is the truth of who I was.

And now as I think about where I am right now, I still have the tendency to be concerned if people will like me or not. Although I recognize this tendency, it doesn't make it any easier to change.  I guess I would like it to be categorized as The People Pleasing Gene. I would like to believe you are either born this way or you are not, because then it makes it easier for me to swallow that pill.

Some are people pleasers.
Some are not.
I am a people pleaser that comes from a long line of people pleasers.
My Giant is not a people pleaser he comes from a long line of non- people pleasers.

I see the good in both.
I see the bad in both.
Somewhere in there, people pleasing and not people pleasing there is neutral ground. A Switzerland if you will of somewhat pleasing people and some what who gives a flying flip people. 

Do hear what I'm saying?
So the other half of that wise woman's statement is what I am working toward today. I feel I have a pretty good handle on who I am at the ripe old age of 37 and now it's just ...

Being okay with that person.

I recognize my need to please. 
And ya know what, I'm okay with the years I have spent doing so. It's what has brought me to this place.
But, at the very same time I want, I seek, balance in all things.
I'm ready to be okay with the person that I am, but not become complacent either at the same time. 

Does that make sense?

Now read this statement again,

"You will spend half your life finding out who you are, and the other half being okay with that person."
And think about it through the eyes of health, fitness and your looks. It takes on a whole new meaning doesn't it?
Maybe a topic for another day.
I thought of character traits when I heard it.
Sister Jen thought health and fitness.
That's why it's good to have a sister.
They help change the way you see the world.
Thankful for my sisters and my brothers this morning and for YOU! 

What are your thoughts about that statement? 


Lisa said...

very lovely post!

Barefoot Hippie Girl said...

I would say that I would think characteristics more than physical. Personality, leanings, etc.. Being comfortable with unique you, and letting others be comfortable with unique them.

Words of Wisdom from Izzy's Ma said...

Well my sweet daughter....I have a few decades on you, I'm not sure I ever totally figured out who I am, I have several definitions, but I am pretty sure I've grown to be ok with myself. There will undoubtedly be parts of my past I'll never be ok with, but by in large I've pretty much accepted myself for who I see as me.
How's that for "do you follow me?"

Ashton Belle said...

Love this post, totally agree with that statement!

Your newest follower Ashton from:

Kelly { MessyDirtyHair } said...

I know exactly what you mean. I still find myself obsession over what people think of me. I hate it. Everyday is different tho! Great post! Xoxo Kelly

Kelly said...

I used to be a people pleaser as well and in some ways I still am BUT in the past few years God has freed me a little bit more from that and WOW is that freeing!!!! My confidence has increased in just being who I am where before it was my job or how I looked or where I lived. God has done a work in me!!!!!! My confidence is with HIM!!! And that changes EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!! Love you girl!

Blog design ©2012 Design by Alyx