So This Just Happened.

Over this past weekend something really big happened in our household.

Even though my 16 year old daughter told me over and over it wasn't a big deal somehow my heart did not get that memo.

I tried to hold it together. I really did. But then this happened.

She pinned a flower on a boy.  Who told her she could do that? Oh wait, I guess we did.  That's right it's all coming back to me now. We were sitting at the kitchen table I'm pretty sure I had only one cup of coffee flowing thru my veins when she asked her dad and I if she could go to the JA dance with a "friend" who is a boy. Now, in my defense I did say that I only had ONE cup of coffee. Mom's cannot be held responsible for anything they say until the SECOND cup of coffee is consumed.
Obviously that rule didn't pan out here because, WE said yes! The plural word there being WE. The operative word there being "SAID." The debatable word there being YES. We said it, but my heart didn't really mean it.

I mean ....  What I meant to say is ... NO. NO you cannot go to any dances with any boys. NO you cannot wear a dress so beautiful and look so stunning that it takes my breath away. NO you cannot pin a flower on a boy when you were dressing up dolls like yesterday. NO you cannot drive away in a car with that boy when you were just learning to ride your bike a minute ago. NO you cannot grow up. NO. Can I do that? I mean, can I take it all back? That's a rhetorical question. Sigh. I realize that I can't turn back time and say no where I previously said yes. I realize I can't stop this train, thank you very much John Mayer. I just, well I just wish sometimes this life would give you a little warning before you witness big life events like this. Daughters who become young women right before your eyes.

Please chime in all you parents who have walked this uncharted territory. I have to share a song that Emma's Auntie Gina sent me that same week. I'll admit it  did give me a little chuckle. I hope you enjoy it  AND  Pray for me.  

On Looking Back and Choices I Made

I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my greatest contribution to this planet is most assuredly my Fab 4 children. It was not for me to be a CEO of a fortune 500 company, or to go to Law School,  or to be a Missionary, but rather it was, to be a full time mom to 4 children.    I know some moms are able to do both,  (career and raising a family) I know some single mommas are forced to do both, but for this momma of 4,  both was simply not my choice.  I'm really grateful that I got the choice.  I have come to realize so much of life, really all of life is made up of choices we make. When I was a young person getting ready to go off to college I derailed from the University I had chosen, and where I had been accepted and had scholarships. I made this choice for the sake of saving a buck and decided to go instead to the community college where I lived.  I don't regret that choice because had I left I wouldn't have ended up with My Giant and then therefore we wouldn't have our 4 children. Would I recommend to all the up and coming graduates to walk in my foot steps? HECK NO!! There is one moment in time where you get to have the freedom to go anywhere and do anything.   IF you have been given the opportunity to do something grand, expensive, and far away ... TAKE IT!! The time for this in your life might not ever come again, so GO FOR IT!! If however you choose to take the safe and practical route like I did, know that there is glory in that too. In this life we make choices, when we aren't honest about those choices we get into a state of being I like to call denial, and although denial is comfy some times, it's not healthy. So,  may I suggest to just be honest about your choices when looking back. I remember along the way making a conscience decision to choose my Fab 4 over career and other passions. It wasn't always easy, and still isn't financially, but I'm never going to regret this life choice. NEVER. EVER. And then something like this quote comes along and confirms your life choice.  "Your greatest contribution to the Kingdom of God may not be something you do but ... SOMEONE YOU RAISE."  Andy Stanley It's hard for me to even begin to imagine "The Kingdom of God" being changed or affected by my life choices, but somehow this quote resonates with me. This quote gives my life purpose beyond what any paycheck or title could ever do.  And it makes me think about my Fab 4 and how they have changed me as a person. They have given me a gift beyond any other earthly token. The gift of motherhood. Although it's a messy, sometimes thankless, and certainly penniless job, it's my favorite.

Settled and Unsettled

Good Morning Beloved Reader-
It feels good to be here with you in this moment.  This is a moment that I have longed for, for quite some time. Do you want to know what moment I'm talking about?  I'm talking about the moment of being settled in. Almost every box is unpacked.  I have a favorite spot, with my favorite reading materials close by, I even got some sewing done last week, and it all feels so very good.  

There is something very unsettling to me about the moving experience. I am a creature who loves to set up camp and stay in that camp a very long, long time. The camp fire embers can be nothing but smoke and I would still linger there. BUT... My Giant moves things.  He's a mover and a shaker. I'm a camper. Together we make a great team, because really who wants camp fire smoke all up in your eyes and all over your clothes? There is a time when moving makes sense and it is necessary, and good, and even something that I want, but still it shakes me to the core. Does that make sense? Are there any other campers out there??
All that to say, It has taken quite a lot out of me these past few months, actually really this whole year, and I'm just now feeling that settled moment, and I'm glad I get to share it with you. 

I want to share something else with you. This past weekend was my 20 year High School Reunion.  Yep, I'm OLD!! I wasn't able to go because we had a family wedding to go to, but I have been having moments of nostalgia all weekend. It was so wonderful to be with my Giant and his clan this past weekend. I got to hear him and his cousins reminisce about their youth and we laughed so hard, but there were also "THANK GOD" moments where they each realized how far they had come, and what they have been delivered from.
It's a very pivotal time, ones youth, don't you agree?
Thinking about my youth makes me happy, because I had a really good Jr. High and High School experience. I thankfully, don't have many regrets from that time in life, and so I look back on it with a tender memory in mind. It's also the reason why I would have enjoyed going to my reunion, I think? But, it also kind of really trips me out at the same time because I can hardly believe that I have children who are 15, 13, 11, and almost 9.  Like, really... When did that happen?
I am the mother of teens and tweens and this brings up all kinds of emotions.

We are having a lot of firsts in the Monosco camp. First time your oldest drives off in a car with friends who are boys. First time your 11 year old boy goes off to camp where there wont' be someone there to remind him to wear deodorant or behave. First time there might be a serious boy, girl relationship looming. First time for crushes, and permits, and dances...
Ya know ... stuff that you deal with when your kids are no longer kids but young adults, being shaped and molded by more people than you can count. I find myself in this weird position of sitting back, but at the very same time, actively putting holes in the carpet on my knees in prayer.

I know this makes perfect sense to those of you who have pioneered before me in these teen and tween years. And let me just take this moment to say, please share your wisdom, share your encouragement, but keep the horror stories to a minimum please.  I said please ;)
It's a time where you have to sit back and hope and pray that all you have planted inside of them will begin to grow, and not just that, but that it will take root.  I pray for very DEEP ROOTS.
"Hang tough lil roots"
This morning is a moment I'm feeling settled but unsettled all at the same time.  Let me explain. My older three kids are off to church camp this week. And  When I don't have all my baby chics under one roof it feels strange. Those of you who have lils, as much as you long for the day that you can sit back and relax because you're not constantly in shear panic mode from that two year old that just won't sit still, just remember this;
Right now you know exactly where that two year old is. (Or at least I hope you do) You know where they will go to sleep tonight. You know what they will eat. You know who they will talk to. You know who they will drive with,  and  You know that as long as they are with the momma bear they are safe.
But, when they get older something very strange happens.  You can no longer control all of this, and it's unsettling and at the same time it is very healthy, and normal, and necessary to let this process happen. Because I mean, no one wants a Smother Motha!! I do so solemnly swear;
I WILL NOT BE A SMOTHER MOTHA!!

Still, I honestly don't know how people without the reassuring presence of the Holy Spirit are able to get through this season in parenting. This morning in my prayer time for my three older kids who are at camp, my Heavenly Father God gave me this reassuring scripture;
"For He has strengthened and made hard the bars of your gates, and He has blessed your children." Psalm 147:13
For this momma bear who would like nothing more than to keep those babies behind bars protected from the world outside that could hurt or harm them... this was exactly what I needed this morning. To know that the GOD of the universe has got my kiddos in the palm of His hands settles my spirit like none other. Don't go reporting me to CPS just cause I want to put my kids behind bars just to keep them safe. I swore up there I wouldn't Smother remember?

No, I think instead of smothering this is the action I will take;
"Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance, and in everything, by prayer and petition(definite requests)with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God. And God's PEACE shall be yours." Phil 4:6-7
And I am once again settled.  I like that settled feeling. I think I will stay a while here in this settled position.

From One Taxi Cab Driver to Another

Good Monday Morning Beloved Readers, I am being featured over HERE at Brooke's place Covered in Grace.  If you have some extra reading time, go stop by and say hello.
Today though...
I would like to go down on record as the mom who warns all of you younger moms about something that no one ever told me about. And that is that once your lils get into double digits something very strange happens to your life. You no longer live in a home but rather out of your car.

Do you think I'm joking? Well, I kid you NOT. Ask anyone who has children in double digits how often they are in the car on a weekly basis, and then ask them if this has changed since their children were younger?
So, let it go on record that you heard it here first, having double digit children = living out of your car. You can now add Taxi Cab Driving to your list of careers. 
Now, I would not just leave you with this bomb shell of information without some helpful tips. Some of these things you may already know or currently have in your car, but just in case you don't, let me help you out. First off, keep pens and pencils handy because children of this age are always needing you to sign something. It used to be that I kept a good amount of pacifiers at the ready, well now I just replaced that spot with pens. All kinds of pens, because they often get snagged for homework and come in handy when you are reading your "go to book" and need to underline where you left off.

Which brings me to survival tip Number two- Always have a "go to book" waiting in the car. At this season in your life you find that you wait outside for events, and other functions quite a bit so in all that waiting, even if you do have your smart phone and can check your email sometimes it's just nice to pass the time waiting with a good go to book. It can't be a book that is hard to get back into. It has to be one that you can leave at a moments notice and pick right back up again a few minutes later. I usually go to the Sweet Potato Queens for this book because they make me laugh, and because they are easy to leave when I need to go on to the next event.
*(But, I must warn you about the Queens you might have to wash your eyes out after reading some of their stuff cause those ladies can be naughty.. funny, but naughty. I should point out a disclaimer here, if you do find your eyes knee deep in a Queens book  I would like to say I don't whole heartedly agree, or advocate what they say. They just make me LOL... so don't judge)
Speaking of the next event, you may have noticed by now that you will be in the car for some time, and you might get hungry so that brings me to  C.  keep a good stash of snacks handy.  I find that pickle flavored sunflower seeds are my favorite, and granola bars are the kids favs. The reason I like the seeds are that they are not high in calorie, but helpful in making you feel like you are doing something with your hands when you are waiting at the lights. Oh the endless waiting. The eternal red lights!!

Hurry up and wait. Hurry up and wait. You will go from one place to the next just to wait some more. The scenery will change but the action will not. Do I sound bitter? I'm really not. I have come to terms with waiting. I think me and waiting are on a first name basis. Mr. Patience and I have a pretty good relationship, but every now and then I like to show him who's boss and get the first cup of coffee before the coffee pot is done pouring. I just get right in there with my cup and say, "Yeah... take that Mr. Patience!!" Ok moving on...
The final note of advice I have for you rookie Taxi Cab Drivers is to keep the essentials well stocked, lotion, wipes, kleenex, chapstick, and sometimes even nail polish. Ahem... yes fixing the chipped nail look can be done with this job sometimes... ya know multi taskers unite!! And beyond that I would only advise that you keep your Playlist OH SO happy!! Oh... and remember that all this busy means you have healthy, happy children who are able to go from here to there and that my friends is something to smile about. Your fuel tank bill.... not so much.

Don't forget who told you first. 
I would love to know if you other taxi cab driving mom's have some tips for me that I didn't list here?
 

Little Eyes, Soap Operas, and Me

"Oh Be Careful Little Eyes what You See,

Oh Be Careful Little Eyes What You See,

For The Father Up Above Is Looking Down With LOVE,

Oh Be Careful Little Eyes What You See."
Have you ever heard this old Sunday School children's song? It goes on to say, Oh Be Careful Little Ears What You Hear Oh Be Careful Little Mouth What You Say  and then back again to the Eyes. It's a classic Sunday School song that has always stuck with me. This past week I was reminded of this song two times. Once with a boy child, and once with a "woman child in a state of Grace." You see, I had one of those profound moments as a parent where you live out a lesson you yourself learned long ago, only now you are on the other end of the lesson.  When I was a young girl I used to watch Soap Opera's. SHOCK. AWE. GASP. Yes, Soap Opera's were my vice. My all time favorite was Days of Our Lives, and later it was All My Children. I would come home from school everyday and turn on the TV to my favorite Soap, eat my after school snack, and dream about the day that A Knight and Shining Armor would come whisk me off my feet and make passionate love to me. Yep. That was me. Until one day I realized that Soap Operas to a woman are kind of like what Porn is to a Man.  Don't act so surprised, you know it's true. We love the story, the romance, the ultimate drama, and not so much the reality. Ok, now hold on right there. IF you are a grown woman who watches Soaps I mean you no harm.  To each his or her own. But for me, there was a point in time that I distinctly remember realizing that Soaps would no longer be healthy for my life, and for the realities in life so I gave them up. So fast forward almost 20 years and I find myself having to teach my children this lesson of being careful about what they spend their free time watching, reading, and looking at.
You've heard that saying,  "You are what you eat." Well, to me watching and reading is kind of our soul's way of eating. What we watch we digest. What we read we digest. And so I realized that I didn't want to digest SOAP anymore. Are you tracking what I'm laying down? That kind of fantasy life only leads to discontentment with reality.  I wanted contentment. I wanted reality. So I gave up Soap. (I didn't give up soap, like real soap silly. I promise I'm still fresh smelling) I have to admit was a strange thing to return to this lesson as the one on the other side of the fence.  When my children had the reactions they did I was surprised at how attached they were to what they were watching/reading.  There were tears. There were hugs. And ultimately, I hope I portrayed the true heart of God which is that although we won't go to "HELL" for watching things like Soap Opera's it's just not the best use of our time. And, it's kind of like... "Garbage in, Garbage out." (I hate even using that cheesy phrase but it really is so very true) I'm glad that song says, "For the Father up above is looking down with LOVE" because that is also the truth. He doesn't condemn us for these kinds of things that eat up our free time, and are frankly a nice distraction sometimes. I think, He just really longs for that time to be spent with Him. It's a good lesson. It's a good reminder. It's all good.
Happy Monday Beloved Reader.

Oh, What Can You Do

These are the things I tell myself to keep my sentimental heart from bursting into a thousand pieces never to be okay again.

I tell myself she's only 14. 

That means I have 4 more years.

4 more birthdays.

4 more Christmases.

And really, who leaves home right away when they turn 18 anyway? (You be quiet Auntie Jenny)

Sure, she is  going into High School for the first time, but at least it's not her Senior year, or worse at least she's not heading off to college.

I tell myself that she will have so much fun. 

That she will always be my baby and come running home whenever she needs a hand to hold, or an ear to listen.

I tell myself that even though I can't enter this new planet(High School) with her, the Holy Spirit can and will lead and guide her.

I tell myself that my prayers for a protective bubble are being heard, and will be answered.

I tell myself I have prepared her well.

I tell myself, It's Only High School.

I tell myself it will all be okay.

Mother of 4

I cannot even begin to tell you the exhaustion that a mother of four feels everyday. Some days are better than others, but most days I find myself from sun up until sun down yawning.

“To be in your children’s memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today”
- Anonymous

It comforts me to know that there are others out there who have survived this mothering gig. Not only survived, but thrived. Those of you who have gone before me, your smile is the light at the end of my very tired tunnel.

“The best inheritance a parent can give his children is a few minutes of his time each day.”
- O. A. Battista


I liken somewhat this exhaustion to back in college when you never have a free moment. Not really. I mean Spring Break is just the exhale of a very long plight of work, study, work, study. And really, those that make the best students, the ones with the shining GPA's are ones that DON'T exhale come Spring Break. That nagging voice that says, even though you don't have homework, you could always be studying. It's kinda like that, only not really.

“If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders.”
- Abigail Van Buren


There is always something, or someone who is in need of you. And this is the part that really baffles me because, I am the mom who is pro independence. I'm NOT the mom who is wiping the butts of 5 year olds. NOPE! As soon as my kids could manage, even remotely the task at hand they were on their own. Might sound harsh, but that's how I roll!

“Parents need to fill a child’s bucket of self-esteem so high that the rest of the world can’t poke enough holes to drain it dry.”
- Alvin Price


Granted, I mean I don't make them go out and get a job once they hit double digits, but they certainly earn their keep around here. Especially that guy up there. It is mandatory that he pay me in hugs and kisses on a regular basis.

“Life affords no greater responsibility, no greater privilege, than the raising of the next generation.”
- C. Everett Koop

One of my favorite quotes from the movie Martian Child is when Joan Cuszak says to her brother in the movie and in real life, "The thing about kids is that they just keep coming at 'cha." No truer words. I am convinced that the person who said this famous quote was a parent, "If it's not one thing, it's another."


And for all the yawns, all the sleepless nights, all the hair-pulling moments, all the messes, there is nothing in the whole wide world that could make me want my life to be any different.

My children, My Fab 4, truly are my life's greatest work!

My Day

Caffiene 6am
‎7am bus drop off,
8:30 bus drop off,
work by 8:45 off by 1,
Library,
Thrift Store drop off,
Oil Change,
Pick up Em early 2p,
Dr-well check for Em to play sports 2:40,
Caffiene 3:30



pick up from bus stop 3:45 appx 5 kids +1 Jr Higher already in tow,
drop off 2 kids that don't belong to me 5:45,
Hubby gets home... pass the baton to go shopping and get Em ready for above sports that start tomorrow,
Caffiene 6:30
back to school Curriculum night for Elementary kids in my house 7p,
Home by 8 ish....
Some minor dental work on Isaiah's front top tooth,
I'd say it was a busy day but the more likely comment these days would be... Welcome to my World!



And What a Beautiful World It Is!!

Tulip Festival 2010

AKA Photographers Dream Come True


We set out on Saturday to check out the famous Tulip Festival that happens every April in the town of Mt. Vernon Washington. The drive to get there for us coming from Redmond is about an hour so I made sure to pick a day when the sun would be shining and I would have plenty of time(or so I thought :/ ). Last Saturday seemed to be the best day. What I didn't expect was that on top of the 2 hours just to get there and back , there would be another 2 and half hours of sitting in our car with bumper to bumper traffic. However, despite all the time spent in our car it was worth the 2 hours we got to walk around and see such beauty. SO, like everything in life if it's something good that happens every year you have to be prepared to share it with others, and to sit in TRAFFIC! Next year I will be sure to bring a kite to fly, sunglasses for all, rain boots for all(well these we brought the boys just refused to wear them) a picnic lunch, lots of things to do for the kids while we sit in unmoving traffic, and most importantly my Giant.






So as not to deceive my faithful few readers, although the day may have looked as if it was picture perfect it was not. My boys were a constant reminder to me that I might not be cut out for parenting two male children. They were a royal pain in the a** and I was about to seriously lose it with them before I realized I was in public and in Washington no less where I might be reported to the CPS. The girls were bickering the whole time about the boys and I had to bribe half of them with ice cream to smile in the pictures. I knew I had lost the battle when Sol after totaling his shoes in a big mud puddle looked up at me with a big smile on his face and said, " I don't care if I don't get any ice cream".
I was reminded of how difficult the life of the single parent must be without having my better half there to back me up. And by the time the very long car ride home came about I was feeling like quite the schmuck by making us all late for a dinner date with our new friend. (Hope she can forgive me for not only this but for doing her dishes as well, so as to appease some of my guilt).

Still after all these set backs I do plan to go again, but never again as the ONLY adult!!