Thursday, August 21, 2008

Is this procrastination based in fear?

I have known for weeks now that a publishing company is interested in my children's picture books. I have known for weeks exactly what I need to do, but I am not doing it.
I have all the time in the world , being that I am still on summer break, but I keep putting it off. Last night Moses asked me what is up with that and I almost choked on my food from surprise. I am surprised by my own fear of failure. I didn't think that I would be so afraid to get that final yea, or nea but apparently I am or I would have sent in my manuscripts by now. I could at least dust them off and start preparing them. I can only guess that sometimes the fear of failure is greater than the never knowing. 
I am going to overcome my fears and I am going to send these books in it's just I wish I wouldn't have waited because now I know like everything else I attempted creatively that I have wasted more than just weeks in this department. I have wasted years. 

5 comments:

Jeni said...

Ditto-- I know the feeling. :)

shontell said...

I completely know the feeling. You have to think more about how you will feel if you let too much time pass and you miss your opportunity. Don't be that guy, Friend. Make a move and let God help you with the rest.

noel said...

jeni- i still need to get the manuscripts to you for a read, thanks again for dinner.
shontell- you are right I don't and I won't , thanks for the encouragement.

TPluckyT said...

You can do this Noel! I'm in the exact same boat! Frustrating, but I'm still determined to press through (someday, when I get around to it :-) )

Becka said...

I know so many authors who are going through this as well - authors who go to conventions, are lucky enough to pitch their idea to an editor who asks them to send them the full manuscript to much rejoicing, only to have them drag their feet upon arriving home.

I really do think there is an "unconscious" fear of failure that stops you from reaching out and grabbing hold of a dream. Because if you get rejected, then what are you going to do? Good news is, there's a million publishers in the sea. :) Always have a Plan A, B, C...

I've been rejected plenty of times but I didn't let it hold me back. What an author MUST do is separate themselves from their work. There are too many hurt feelings when there's a negative review on their book. The reviewer is reviewing the BOOK, not YOU as a person.

In the same way, editors at a publishing house accept or reject the story on it's own merit, not on a personality trait you might have. It's all about the $$ signs, really. If it's a good story and they believe they can make $$ off it, they'll offer you a contract.

What I did is I prayed. I told God it was all in His hands. I firmly believe I'm not the driver in my life. God's not my "co-pilot", He's THE Pilot. Therefore, if it's His will, it will happen, if not with this publisher, then with another.

But the point is, at some point, you gotta crawl out of that boat and walk on the water.

~~Becka

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