Monday, September 11, 2006

1 year ago today and then 5 years ago.....

One year ago today my beloved grandmother Joan LeSage passed away from this earth to go home. I loved this woman so much and it hurts to think of her not being here anymore but I am thankful that the sting of death is not all that I feel on this day. I know in my heart that I will see her again and so this time apart doesn't hurt as bad. I know that I will see her smiling eyes again. I know that her hug will warm my spirit again. I know this like I know that my name is Noel, or that my hair is brown, or that I have 4 children. I know this.
This makes me think of the other saddness of this day. All those lives that were lost 5 years ago. They were taken way before the long full life that my grandmother was given. Thier deaths were not nearly as peaceful. She died in her sleep , they died in terror and fear and long before they should have. Thier families didn't get to say goodbye and many of them don't have the assurance that they will ever see them again. That assurance is a gift. It steals the pain away from the sting of death like nothing else can. It is I believe what we are here to realize . That we are eternal beings and that one place or another we will live on.
This was a strange day for me with mixed emotions. A visit from my brother and then from my dad and then with a close friend. I am left feeling sad for those people who are still in fear of death and happy about my grandmother's beautiful long life lived. Mixed emotions. Trying to make sense of it all.

1 comment:

Jen Pell said...

Hey sis...its funny because I've been thinking and talking about Grandma in my classes this week. We're doing a family tree so the kids can say aunt, uncle, grandmother, etc. Anyways, I sort of forgot it was one year ago. It still just seems like a few months ago. Strange....I was even saying "Last fall my Grandma died...my wonderful italian grandma..." But it was a year ago. Wow. Now I'm in shock. I saw that movie United 93 and actually got angry and also quite sad for the loss of life. We need to talk soon!!! I hope this weekend you'll have time. Once I get through this week, it will be beautiful. Love you.

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