Oprah and Me

I , on occasion indulge myself in two magazine purchases. One of them is People, of course I know full well how silly this magazine is but I enjoy it anyway, and the other is Oprah or O magazine. I know that last one is shocker right? I really do think her magazine is one of the best out there.

Anyway, this month's issue immediately caught my eye because as an occasional viewer of her show I have noticed that she has been going up in size and like the rest of the world I was wondering what the heck was going on. I was sad to find that it was due to some health problems and unbalance in her life and it made me think about my own weight issues that I have dealt with my whole life.

Then last night  the episode on the O show that day was her personal interview of herself speaking about "what the heck happened" to her this time. I sat down after the kids were all in bed and I was surprised by how emotional I got watching her show. Again, I think this episode hit home because of my own issues, but also I felt very sad again for her. It's funny how you can become so intrigued and interested in a person you have never met but I am and I was very sad for her. 

Anyway, there I was balling like a baby and thinking what is going on here? I think what really hit home was when her friend, Bob Greene looked at her and basically said that he thought she might be suffering from a mild case of depression. I knew that was exactly what had happened to me. These past few months pretty much since my coming home from Europe last year in March, I have been in a battle against this ugly monster called depression.

I know why I was depressed which really helps but that didn't seem to change any of the ways I was dealing with this depression. I am most certainly and emotional eater. This becomes quite evident to me when I am eating unconsciously or without reservation.

I had before the New Year began decided that I really needed to get back to exercising regularly and eating better which I was doing before we went on break but then I totally got off the wagon, Again!! 

So here I am once again dealing with this issue of not really being so concerned about my weight but healthy living. I have never in my entire life consistently for more than a year had a healthy way of eating, exercising and just otherwise being human. 

I am determined to once again learn from this hiccup along the road of health and take away what I can from it. I am still very discouraged with myself for letting it get this bad, and although I am not Oprah who went over 200 pounds again I am for my body not feeling as great as I could. 

I want to get really good at this healthy living not only for my sake but for my daughters who are quickly approaching an age that really picks up on any underlying unhealthy weight issues.

I want to be a good example to them in this area. I want to do this for myself though because it really comes down to making time for yourself which I think every mom and dad knows that can be hard to do. It means I have to make some changes, adaptations, sacrifices that might affect others but is primarily for me, myself and I.

I am determined, I am stubborn, I am tenacious and God help me,  I will do this!!