Knowing who you are

Knowing who you are.
This topic is one that has been rolling around in my mind for a while now. I think for many of us this is something that we don't really grasp until much later in life. For others, they are so full of who they are that it pours out of them and there is no doubt when you encounter these kind. For most though I think it is a process.
It has been a process for me ,and one that I am still not finished with yet ,but getting a lil more confident in- who I" truly" am.
I think what might have started this thought is when I posted about my grandmother being so much of who I am and then reading a fellow bloggers post about his dad, and yet another blog about how we try to identify ourselves with what we wear,what car we drive,what music we listen to, what sports team is our fav, etc... These are external things that all too often come to identify the eternal soul inside.
I think some things that help in knowing who you are is knowing where you came from, also where you are going but mostly for all those who follow Christ it is the same; We are His .
Tonight at youth group the topic was being God's vessel and Knowing that you are chosen. In small group time a comment was made that knowing that "you are chosen by God" is important because it keeps you from doing some things that you shouldn't but also encourages you to branch out and do some things that maybe you wouldn't if you didn't have your faith.
Anyway, after tonight I thought that I would put this topic out there and see if there are more words of wisdom about it .
I have to say that I don't think it is a healthy thing to spend too much time thinking about ourselves I just hope that when the rubber meets the road on this journey i won't take the wrong turn just cause I don't know who I am or where I am going.(Hope that makes sense) If not don't comment!!!

Sharing

Sharing....is this not something we should have down by our 30's?? By down, I mean be good at.
Taking a thought from Jason's blog about sharing food on his plate, and then thinking about how hard it has been for me to accomodate for only having one car right now got me thinkin that I am really not that good at the basics . Isn't sharing one of the basics? Seems so simple but when it comes right down to it I don't think I like sharing. I mean when it makes everyday life a bit uncomfortable. wah, wah, wah, just humor me . i feel like such a smhuck, knowing that so many others have it way worse(brewers who can't even fit whole family in one car) but all the same it doesn't make it any easier for the lil 5 year kid in me who is sick of sharing.
Call me selfish, BUT I WANT MY CAR BACK!!!
Akay, I feel better now.
Just thought I would share that with you all.
Poor Giant , working day and night to get his lil vdub car on the road. I love you, I just don't want to share anymore, okay? okay?
Fellow bloggers please don't hold this blog against me, know that its just a moment and that this too shall pass!!! Thanks

Some Scofield funnies

Today while waiting to pick up Chloe from school , Sol says to me "Look mom they have trapped a robot inside that fence!" I say, "Hugh" not even looking. Then he says it again, "Look mommy, it has two eyes, a nose and really long arms, can I go climb the fence and let it out?" I say , "What are you talking about??" He says, "LOOK" This time because he is so enmphatic I look directly where he is pointing and see that he is talking about the power meter(i think that's what you might call it) that is inside a chain link fence, probably for safety reasons, directly in front of the school. " "Oh, no you can't go climb the fence and let the robot out , the principal might need that robot for something later" The mind of a soon to be 4 year old boy. So Great!!
Later, after school talking with Emma my 7 year old, I say," What is your favorite season Em?" She thinks long and hard and then says very certainly, " I think Summer when it's warm because that's when ice cream is in high demand" hee hee hee , Keeping a straight face I say, "Oh really why is that?" She says rather condescending "Well, certainly because it is so hot outside" Who has this kid been hanging around , that's what I want to know. Mann, if only I could sound as smart at 30 as she does at 7 sheesh!!!

Please Pray

Just thought I would ask for prayers for a close friend who has had to evacuate in Texas with 4 small children and two puppies. Please pray for all those in the south and for a miracle in the weather predictions.

eharmony.com

Akay, so I have this friend ahem.... that well lets just say, I want to see enter into the world of marital bliss,and well... this other friend and myself were thinking why don't we secretly put them on one of those singles internet things. Ya know just to see what the results would be, ya know just for fun. Well, my Giant is not so happy with me and I thought why not find out what all my bloggin pals think.
So if you were this friend what would your thoughts be??? I haven't signed on the dotted line yet for this friend BUT the first 5 matches look promising and I am oh.... so....... tempted!!!!

il mio grandma bello

My beloved gramma Johanna,Jennie,Joan Farina/LeSage passed away September 11, 2005. She was 83 years old and had suffered for over 10years with alzhemiers. She closed her eyes to sleep on this earth and opened them in heaven. She has now been given a new name and is in her true eternal home.
She was the most Christ-like person I have ever known and her beauty because of this was beyond compare. She was born in South Braintree Massachusetts. The family that she came from was the Farina's . Her mother and father both came to the states from Italy when they were only children and thier marriage was an arranged marriage that brought forth 6 wonderful, amazing people 5 girls and only 1 boy. Because she was the first to get married,have children, and move out west she was the pioneer of her family. In her life she was married 49years before my grandpa died, they had 5 children,16 grandchildren, and 29 great grandchildren. They raised a family of faith, with each person as unique and talented, kind and loving , funny and incredibly charasmatic as the next.
When my mom was growing up she said that gramma used to set an extra place at the dinner table every night just in case someone who needed the meal might not feel welcome enough to stay otherwise. She said usually they would have a few new faces around the dinner table most nights, and I know this is where my mothers heart of mercy and love for her neighbors comes from.
My gramma had all 5 of her children before the age of 25. She never learned how to drive a car but she had more than enough adventures and great stories to tell . Once shortly after having my first child I asked her "Gramma how did you do it? Raising 5 kids all so close in age with not much help from Granpa, and no way to get out and about?" She said as clear as day(even with some alzhemiers kickin in), "I just did it, I didn't think about it" Her family was her life. Her husband, who she lovingly referred to her as "Her pal" and her children were the jewels, the treasures she took so much joy in.
Her father, a beautiful man who loved Jesus but never went to church. The reason, because the catholic church started charging families to buy the pews they would sit in every Sunday and he refused. He said he and his family would have church at home and they did . Every Sunday they would read the bible in thier living room on 39 Fountain Street.He used to drive an oil truck in the time of the depression, and any extra oil that would drip out of the truck he would save in a can to be delivered to families in great need. He was a "Robin Hood" of sorts.That was one of his many ministries. My gramma was born in 1922 and shortly after she was born , countless diseases that took many other lives was stopped in time for her with the very first administrations of immunizations.She was a miracle. Her sister Elizabeth, was not as fortunate. She had 5 sisters and only one brother Louie who also passed away in January of this year. Louie Farina, adored his Jennie and so it is only appropriate that they left in the same year. My gramma was only 5 feet tall. She fell in love and was married at the young age of 19 to my Granpa a half Irish half French man who wasn't even supposed to talk to the italian women back in that day. He asked if he could carry her books from school home for her. At first she said no, but then every day he didn't stop asking, and finally she said yes, and the rest is part of my history now.
Three sons and two daughters,my mother Ellen was her fourth child. All her children were born in South Braintree Massachusetts and moved out west when they were in thier teens and pre-teens.
Some of the sayings and things that I will remember the most about my beautiful gramma; "When you think a fella is really interested in you and you like him too, the first question you be sure to ask him is, How much did you say your name was worth?" "The smart one shuts up" "God love ya" "Can I get you anything" Her theme song that she would sing alot, so simple and yet so true "Row,row,row your boat gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily life is but a dream"
Her homemade meatballs or italian cookies( covetchonis). Her love for children and her protection of them. Her love for music. There was always music in her life. My Grampa would play the organ or the accordion or her children the guitar. Always had a song in heart and a smile on her face. "Peace be with you". "I pray everyday for all my friends and benefactors, my family, and the most forgotten soul, I think that pretty much covers everyone""If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all"
To everyone she met she would say goodbye by saying " God Bless ya" . Her life was a blessing to all who were blessed enough to know her . These are only a very few of my beloved memories. Her life was so rich, so full that it would take me alot longer to write them all. So much of who I am is because of her. I have been truly so blessed, so fortunate to have had her for my grandmother. I am truly thankful to God for all the wonderful things that she taught me. I know that she is finally home, restored to perfect health and with her Savior now and that brings me great comfort, but I still miss her already.
On this day I will try to keep her memory close to my heart by being gentle and merry, being kind to children, singing songs of joy,winking as a sign of approval and acceptance , raising one eyebrow to the things in this world that make me wonder. In tribute to her I will try to teach my children all the things that she taught me, and instill a strong sense of faith, love for others and a strong sense of identity. Her heritage was one of love,faith, service,and perserverance. Her legacy was not riches, possesions, or property but rather lots and lots of spoken blessings and love. She truly loved everyone.

I pray that I will honor her by living a life much like her own with as much faith, grace, love, humility, peace, and kindness as she lived hers with. Ti amo Gramma, I will miss you until we meet again.

Her Children Stand and Bless Her...Prov31:28

My mom is THE most amazing woman I have ever known. She is truly a modern-day saint to me. You know the scripture that describes true religon as taking care of widows and orphans ,she currently has both living under her roof right now as well as my beloved vietnam vet Uncle Jimmy. These are her family members and so some might say what's so amazing about that?? Well, I will tell you . She is going to be 60 in November and I am not being generous when I say that she does more for Christ on a daily basis than I might in a year. God has given her a true heart of mercy and truly has used her to be an instrument of His love to countless others who have had no home and no where else to look. The widow, my beautiful italian gramma who has alzhemiers is in constant need of care. 24/7 my mom is changing her, feeding her,bathing her, reading to her...everything. My mom has hard days as all human beings do but when all is said and done she truly feels honored to be the one who gets the privledge of serving my gramma in her last days and she treasures every moment. The orphan(no longer) is my 13 year old brother who my parents have had as a foster child since the day he was born and officially adopted when he was 3. He is a typical teenager in many ways in that he has lots of energy and lots of pressing social engagements that require a taxi cab. Thankfully, he is one of sweetest spirits I have known and is helpful to my mom on many occasions but, still very much a young boy. My uncle well....lets just say he would fit in perfect with my nieghbors down the street!! My dad is working hard at Albertson's to keep all those in the house fed and in a house.

Ok that's just her living situation. Now, my mom is of the firm belief that Jesus really meant it when he said "love your neighbors" cause she has got some neighbors that are starving for that love and they always seem to know that they can get it at Ellen's and it served up just right.
Her neighbors baffle me. She has always seemed to have neighbors that are strategically placed on her block that are the most needy of all people on the face of the EARTH!! She has learned over the years some boundaries and that it is not her job to save the WHOLE world, BUT all the same it amazes me how much she notices the needs, and then meets them. Amazing!!
She is not sugar-coated in her delivery of love and kindness. She is real and they know that they will always get sincerety with her good or bad.

Yesterday, I had a full day. A day that was so full of DOING and loving people that I had to laugh. I thought this is an Ellen kinda day. I decided to share my day with my mom cause I knew she would relate and again she has taught me yet another lesson at 30 years of age. She said, "Noel you weren't doing what I do, you were doing what Jesus would do" and then of course she chimed in with her Boston accent and said "Don't those people know you have fourwa childrwen of yourwa own" LOL . Truly, I love her with all my heart and today "I stand and bless her " for the example she has been and continues to be.

They're baaackk!!!

Yes , the burning man people have returned and quite dusty I might add. They actually have been trickling in this whole week and the returned product is more fun to watch then when they left.
So, my interest has been peeked. I checked out the website and low and behold you can actually bring children to this event. They have a whole section on how to make this into a fun, family trip. Whooaaa!!! I am really, really a bit perplexed and lil concerned now.
I thought about walking down there today and passing out tickets to the car wash but then I thought I better save those for myself cause they were given to ME from a very thoughtful friend, and my car that is lookin pretty shabby again should really be the benefactor of those.
Anyhew, I discovered from thier own advertisement on the back of one of the RV's that my nieghbors house is officially known as the Black Rock Sage Burning Man Hostile. Hmmm....and again I say Hmmmm.....
Does this mean that they might be there for months to come. COOL!! I am enjoying the free entertainment and who knows maybe I will get to figure out what all the hype is about from them.
I am trying to think of way to start up a conversation but then again maybe not. Dunno if I am brave or trained enough for this social event.
Any ideas???

Reasons why I love Jesus #2 , His Extravagant Love

His love is extravagant. It is more than any words could ever describe and to even try to describe in words the way that Jesus loves is almost futile,weak at best. There truly are no words that do it justice but one that comes a lil close to me and also a word that seems to keep being highlighted in life right now is extravagant.
Websters describes extravagant like this-
Exceeding reasonable bounds
Extremely abundant
Straying beyond limits or bounds
These descriptions begin to describe another reason why I love Jesus. That He FIRST loved me, while I was not nearly as in love with Him as I am now is extravagant. That He never stops loving me even when my actions don't show my love for Him is extravagant. That in every detail of this life, behind every corner He is revealing His love to me is extravagant.
The song from Darrell Evans "Your love is extravagant"is one that has become a new favorite.
"Your love is extravagant
Your friendship intamate
I find myself moving to the rhythms of your grace
Your love is extravagant"
I love Jesus because of the way He loves me. I want to love the way He loves. I want to love the unlovely, the ones who don't love me, the ones who don't love me first, the ones who may never love me or YOU Jesus . I want to love them the way you do and by doing so I want to show my love. My love for you Jesus can never compare but all the days of my life I want to spend every ounce of who I am, who you created me to be, to love you and others in only the ways that I can.
Thank you Jesus for your extravagant love.

Yikes, I've been tagged,the pressure!!

Akay, so I have been tagged and usually I don't like to play along with ...well....pretty much any game but since this is not physical I guess I can handle it.
I think I have to list 5 quirks and then tag someone else to do the same so here goes.
1. I love Donald Duck. Love 'em. His voice makes me laugh and feel giddy inside and anyone who can do a good impression of his voice pretty much wins major brownie points with me and are further seen as a better person.
2. I can touch my tongue to my nose. I have never actually used this manuevuer to lick my nose but when I am an old lady someday and I don't feel like gettin up for the tissue box it might come in handy.
3.CAN'T STAND the sound of people chewing, smakin, or anything that remotely comes close to either of those two. If there is no other noise in the room when it's eatin time I will find a radio or otherwise the innocent smaker might be maimed.
4.I think I am allergic to kiwi. It makes my tongue tingle and feel kinda numb and yet when given the opportunity I eat it anyway.
5.Old men to me, are as cute as babies in my book
Whew... I think that's about all I feel I can reveal at this time.
Hope others are up for playing games, I tag(simply because you make me laugh) Mr. Oakes and (because I don't have a clue what you will list)My Oldest Sista.

Recent Prayers of The Scofield Kids

So, something that I have loved to do for years is quote my children in thier own special quote books, and well, as of late it has been thier prayers that have been most worthy of quotin. I thought for everyones enjoyment and the lighter side of life I would share some of them with you all.
Solomon- "Momma, I prayed for to Jesus , that for my birwfday that He would send snow and fireworks."
Chloe at lunch-"Dear Lord I pray that you keep us healthy with this good food and more good foods like fruit is healthy, and brocolli is healthy, and milk is healthy, and you Jesus you are healthy ......right Momma??" "Right Chloe"
Emma at bedtime-"I pray for our friends Promise,Samantha, and Nikki that they would feel right at home in thier new home in Oregon and that if that don't that would come back home to thier home in Reno."
Chloe after first day of kindergarten-"Lord thank you for my good day and my new lots of friends, and tomorrow that I go again to school so I will know my friends names.

Reasons why I LOVE JESUS

#1 He understands me even when I don't understand myself.

Reading in My Utmost for His Highest today it described the act of Marywho poured fragrant perfume all over Jesus feet as "an extravagant act of devotion"
Mark 14:3-4
This got me thinkin if I have ever shown Jesus in an extravagant way my devotion to him. I really couldn't think of any.
I struggle with issues of Lordship in even the simplest things let alone extravagantly loving Him. This brought me to the number one reason I love Jesus, because He understands. He knows all things even when I don't, when I can't, or even when I choose that I won't ,He is still understanding of me. It comforts me to know that I don't have to understand myself or others or even Him, just continually look to the author and finisher of my faith and then I can breathe easier. He's ok with the fact that I don't often understand the way that He works or how things play out in my life . He is ok with my honesty and He knows me better than I know myself.
I am constantly frustrated by the parallel between the apostle Pauls dilema in his life with Christ and my own,where he states "the things I want to do, I don't,and the things I don't want to do , I do" Romans 7:19 Why is that??
This is so true of my life. When I am truly at my end with me I look to Jesus and
He understands and that is so so so amazing.
His love is amazing(Darrell Evans song) I can't remember all the words but I think this songs describes His love being extravagant, amazing,...
Extravagance in love for Jesus. How does that work? Can I love Him extravagantly like He loves me? Am I capable of this love?
I am glad that He understands . I want to love Him this way. Holy Spirit help me love Jesus the way He deserves to be loved.