Tid Bits

I have been crocheting up a storm. Mostly just headbands with buttons. It has been a longtime dream of mine and I have attempted several times to learn from different teachers. All to no avail, UNITL... my momma Nash pointed out to me that it was because I was trying to do it with my right hand instead of my left. Total lightbulb moment and now, it is my latest greatest hobby to keep me busy on the grey days. I really enjoy this hobby and it reminds me of both of my grandmothers. I would love to be able to learn how to make more than just headbands with flowers and scarfs but for now, I am happy with that at least.




My daughter went to her open house/ Jr. High/orientation thingy this morning. She got her locker combo. I remember when lockers were a really big deal and my greatest stress in life was not having enough time in between classes to go back and forth between my locker and classes. Sigh.....




My dog has been itching, scratching, and itching some more due to the new climate we live in we now have to worry about things like flea collars and stuff. I remember when I lived somewhere that I didn't even know what a flea collar was nor did I ever have to purchase them for my pets. This reminds me of all the changes that have taken place for us this past year. Adapting to a new place involves much more than just a new zip code.



My other daughter is looking over her shopping list of back to school items that she got from her teacher today. She is making her own list of things she already has and things she still needs. She likes making lists. She is like her mother that way. I love finding her lists all over the house. This reminded me of her list last year that she made for things she wanted to do for her birthday. Her Aunt Jenny loved that list so much she blogged about it.



September 1st is when the FAB 4 all go back to school. 7th, 5th, 3rd, and 1st grade. We are entering a whole new world. Here's to a wonderful summer, a whole new school year, and to Life in general.

What a wonderful world !!

Hope Part 3

“ But this I recall and therefore I have HOPE and expectation;

It is because of the Lord’s mercy and loving-kindness that we are not consumed, because His tender compassions fail not.
They are new every morning; great and abundant is Your stability and faithfulness.

The Lord is my portion or share says my living being (inner self); therefore I will hope in Him and wait expectantly for Him. The Lord is good to those who wait hopefully and expectantly for Him, to those who seek Him, inquire of Him, and require Him by right of necessity and on the authority of God’s word. It is good that one should hope in and wait quietly for the salvation, the safety and ease, of the Lord."
Lamentations 3:21-26

This would be the portion of these past 3 blogs where I would like to take the right to use a little thing called a soap box. If you would be so kind as to let me get up on it for a minute, I promise not to stay there for very long.

In the above scripture the writer says that "It is because of the Lord's mercy and loving-kindness" that he has HOPE , expectations, and is not consumed. I too, would like to shout out a HUGE; AMEN,or here, here !, or YES !, or I agree wholeheartedly with that!! There were so many, many things this past year that tried to consume me and yet, I had HOPE. There are so many things these days that come to rob, kill, and destroy the life that God has given us... but IF we hope in Him we won't be consumed.

I would like to say that the above scripture is quickly becoming one of my all time favorites because it talks about not only HOPE, but also the reward for those that HOPE in Christ Jesus, "Safety, Ease, Peace, Salvation" these are all the rewards of hoping in God. He is the only one worth hoping in, because He never fails.

I could easily look back on this past year and think, "How could you have failed me God? Where are you in all of this wreckage that is now my financial situation?" But, I don't see it like that. I choose NOT to see it like that. I SEE that God was there all along. That HE was the one that kept my children from harm these past 2 years when we didn't have health insurance for them. That he kept food on our table, warmth in our cabin, and people around us for support. That he kept Mo and my hearts intertwined, in love, and gave us strength in character when the times got really tough. That HE changed our hearts and minds, and healed our internal emotional wounds, like no Doctor ever could. That HE is still healing, still moving, still alive, and still worth hoping in.

This is the God I serve.

This is why I HOPE in Him.

This is why I wait, expectantly for Him to turn ALL things to GOOD.

After all, isn't He the one that calls a thing "GOOD" - Genesis 1:31

I don't think I could explain better than what this says for the reason of my HOPE. And so that being said, I am getting off my box now. Hope is a powerful God given tool to keep us out of the "depths of despair" . To quote from Anne of Green Gables "to be in the depths of despair means you have turned your back on God". Friends, don't turn your back on God.

You can bank on Him, truly like no other.

HE IS FAITHFUL and so full of HOPE!

Hope Part 2

Hope.

It's something that comes from deep within.

It cannot be moved by circumstance.

It does not easily cave in by popular demand.

It is a word that has been used by politicians, theologians, and poets for thousands of years to evoke a response.

“To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.”

We took a risk this past October. It was painful. It is still sometimes painful.

When a move occurs as far away as ours, and under the circumstances that ours did, you sometimes feel like you have to know why?

We hoped for something better.

"Hope deferred makes the heart sick"

When the outcome of your hopes comes crashing down around you, you have to reevaluate, restructure, reinvent, and renew what it is you truly hoped for in the first place.

I can still remember the first time in my life when my hopes were dashed. It was one of the most painful experiences in my life. And I still remember the faith it took to hope again. I am so glad I did begin to hope again.

In my life I have come to know and be known for having a hopeful, optimistic spirit. I do believe it is God given. I do believe it is for a reason. I am not always full of hope. I sometimes doubt if this character trait would be described but others as being incredibly naive.

“Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow.”

“Never let go of hope. One day you will see that it all has finally come together. What you have always wished for has finally come to be. You will look back and laugh at what has passed and you will ask yourself... 'How did I get through all of that?”

For me when I look back on the past 2 years and ask the above question; "how did I get through all of that?" I know the answer.

still more to come on this topic....

Hope Part 1

“Never let the sense of failure corrupt your new action.”

The above quote has got to be an all time favorite of mine now, in regards to quotes that give me Hope.

To me it has always been one of the things I consider to be most helpful in my relationship with God. The fact that He never holds things over my head or brings past mistakes back up again. He is always the one who encourages, ever so gently to move forward. Forward motion, what a beautiful thing!

A while back, I would say it has been almost 2 and half years back now I got stuck on the idea that Hope often gets overlooked in the verse that says, “Now these 3 things remain; Faith, Hope, and Love and the greatest of these is Love.” I am not disagreeing with the manual on this one, I just wondered why for so many years I never really paid close attention to that word HOPE?

It got me thinking about the fact that maybe it’s because I never really in all my 30+ years ever had a reason to really “keep hope alive.”
Maybe when you have love and you have faith, hope just kinda gets lost by the waste side?
Maybe when you are not in a place in your life that seems hopeless you don’t even realize that you need this hope that others speak of?
It’s like being on a boat and until it’s sinking and you are desperately trying to find a way to safety, you don’t realize that there are get away boats all around you and a life vest right by your side.

Until the past 2 years came along the word Hope, the action of Hope was not as necessary. But, this past year I have clung to Hope like a newborn baby clings to it’s mother.

(To Be continued)

Summer 2010

These are just a few of my favorites so far....

Me and Mo at the Georgetown Farmers Market

These are now surrounding our outside porch and garden fence, trying to keep the bugs away

The front outside porch, or The picture of summer here in Redmond WA.

This picture = Leisure

Isaiah Gregory

Happy 6th Birthday Pasty Gangster #2

I have been keeping this list secret for far too long....

Isaiah’s List for His 6th Birthday Party

“First the funnest things go first, okay Mom”

1. Throw pies at each other.
2. Next....We are going to do present sharing. Where everyone gets a present from each other. This is after cake
3. Next... Oh wait I forgot dinner, which we will have pizza I think.
4. Next... A big wedding cake
5. AND NEXT... GO SURFING!! and then a lemon sign. (I think he means a lemonade sign for a Lemonade Stand)
6. And then we are all going to make a ramp which the green the car can go up on and then jump with the green car on the ramp.
7. And then... bowling
8. AND then... I think for one of my presents I will let Dad have the day OFF!!”
(This list was made 2 months ago when Mo was working everyday, now Isaiah would like to make an addendum.)
9. Mom should have the day off.

“Okay On the back let’s “vite” invite the people. It is going to be an (A) (B) pattern. First I choose then you choose.”

(A) Mike and Amoure

(B) John V.

(A) Jentry and Joe

and then he got really close and with big eyes whispered... THEN we could invite INDIANS!!
(B) Andrew and Renata also Big Isaiah and his family

(A)Jonathan from my school

(B) Baby Vinnie and his mom and dad


***I COULD NOT MAKE THIS STUFF UP IF I TRIED!!! MAN OH MAN HOW I LOVE 5 YEAR OLDS. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITHOUT A 5 YEAR OLD IN MY HOUSE?

A Few BIG Things in Pictures

Emma's 6th Grade Graduation. I now have a Jr. Higher, IN THE HOUSE!


A much needed visit with family.




Let the good times roll.



Moses is back in the business of drawing on people.

Turning the Corner

It was the first day of summer today.
It didn't feel like the first day of summer.

I worked from 8-5p today and sat there thinking of all the fun things I could be doing with my family and friends.

I am thankful for my job.
I am taking deep, deep breaths regarding this said job.

It was hard to go to work this morning.
It is hard to be a grown-up sometimes.

I am ready for a new tattoo and I am pretty sure that it will have something to do with this past year, a symbol of HOPE.

I am singing, "Oh Mr Sun, SUN PLEASE SHINE DOWN ON ME" an awful lot these days.
I am also singing, a quiet song in my soul that helps me feel better.

It isn't always easy moving 700+ miles away, especially on days like Father's Day.
It is still beautiful, green, and where I want to be though.

I really miss my niece.
I like watching Reno 911, it reminds me of why I moved.

It is funny how I say, "That is NOT okay" so much when I am teaching that only 2 months later my new students are now saying this phrase. Makes me smile.
It is strange how the text, Ephesians 4, keeps popping up and reminding me of so many things I need to remember.

I am amazed at how Coconut Creme Pie can transport one to the heavenly realms. Thank you Gramma Shelle.
I am thankful for words.

It is the first day of summer for me in a new state, with a new job, and a new season of life has once again turned the corner.

A New Thing

This time of year brings a lot of busy to our household. We have two birthday girls and then our anniversary to follow both of those. I remember when I was preggers with Emma and her original due date was for June 4th the day right after our anniversary. I prayed so hard that she would come a little early. Most women want baby to come early just because by the third trimester life becomes quite uncomfortable. I prayed, so that I wouldn't have to share this special date with anyone else beside my giant, and God listened.

Our anniversary tradition for many years now has been to go to a VW show called Bug O Rama in Sacramento. I think we have had this tradition for at least the past 9 years. When the kids were little we brought them with us, until we realized we could camp out and have more than just a family fun day, we could get some "alone time", very hard to come by that with 4 children.
This year we didn't make it to Bug O Rama because well.... we live too far away. When I realized that we wouldn't be going this year it actually brought tears to my eyes. These are the kind of things that when you move away you don't realize you are giving up.

Little traditions here and there have been passing us by now that we live here.

To be quite honest, most of them come and go and it doesn't bother me, but there are a handful of traditions that I have made memories with people over the years that I really have been sad to miss out on this year. And, Bug O Rama is without a doubt on that list.

This event Bug O Rama, I realize now wasn't about the vast amount of VW's that we got to see, or the parts that we could buy for dirt cheap, and it wasn't about the camping either.

It was about the people.

In the end it always comes back to the people.

So this year, instead of going to Bug O Rama my cousins the Farina's offered to take all 4 of our children overnight so that Moses and I could get some "alone time". I can't begin to even express how much we have needed this time together.
We have been in process this whole long 9 months since we moved here. Anyone who knows what that word "process" means knows that being "in process" is not easy. Your feelings and thoughts change from day to day and about the only thing that remains the same(except of course our Creator) is that you are still in process. I feel we are about to birth another baby. A moving baby. What it will be named has yet to be determined. But, that's a story for another day.

We hit Georgetown yesterday to make new memories and maybe even a new tradition. I have to say, that of all the places so far that I have experienced living in the Seattle area, Georgetown is quickly becoming a favorite. We went to a Farmers Market, checked out shops, walked on some old train tracks, talked, talked, and talked some more. We of course brought Vicky, Victoria(our bus) along for the ride. She felt right at home in Georgetown, unlike how she feels here in Redmond.



After walking around it was time for some grub. There are so many places to choose from when it comes to the culinary choices in Seattle. It is almost overwhelming to think of especially without our buddy Johnny V. who knows just about everything there is to know about "Good Eats" in Seattle. In the end, we decided to take the money we would've spent on a nice dinner and we bought something we have been meaning to buy since we moved here, a new Weber BBQ. We couldn't afford a big one so we got a Baby mini Weber and it will work out just fine until we can afford the Daddy Weber. On the menu was without a shadow of a doubt THE BEST blue cheese burger I have ever had in my life. Courtesy of Master Chef Moses. With bbq, and groceries in hand we headed back to most beautiful campground ever 180th Ave NE.

This time of year feels like a graduation for the whole family. This year more than ever. WE have all weathered the storm of a HUGE move and have come out on the other side, still in love, still laughing, still enjoying where we have moved.



Do we have regrets about this move? Sure of course we do. But, anyone who knows me knows that I don't dwell on the negative for very long. I choose not to live or camp out there. I am reminded of the scripture that says, "See I am doing a new thing". It's hard not to look back on what we have lost, but in the end I would like to remember what we have gained.

Sidenote- this was our 15th honey moon and it was GOOD. 15th year is your crystal year, we looked all day yesterday in shops for a crystal unicorn. Yep, that's what we wanted to remember our 15th year. Crystal Unicorn is what we are now on the hunt for :)

If you read this whole blog and insight to my thoughts as of late you are AMAZING and should be given some kind of award!

15 Years Ago...

It started with a glance out of the corner of my eye.



It then turned into a good long stare when he wasn't looking.



Which quickly became a High School girls crush.



Crushes have their way of becoming obsessions.



Obsessions have a way of getting a little out of control and making The Creator of said obsession a little angry.



Which gave some time for The Creator to perfect things.



And perfect things have a way of working out perfectly.



Perfecting something called Love isn't always easy.




Love is so strong it deserves to be recognized with symbols, dates, tokens, and certificates.



But those things aren't what defines this LOVE.





This LOVE multiplied 4 times over.



This LOVE 16 years later looks and feels different than when it first began.



It feels like a thirst being quenched. Like a need being met.




Like winning the lottery. It feels like "a peach, soft, fuzzy, and juicy" says the man I married 15 years ago June 3, 1995.





I met and married a boy who has turned into the man that can still make me smile like no other person I know.


He is now without a doubt my best friend, lover, amazing father of our 4 children and still the one I would rather be with than anyone else on planet earth!

Emma Faith

The day she was born was amazing. A few weeks before her birth her Auntie Hillary passed on. She never got to meet her dad's only sibling, but Hillary did feel her move in my belly. Her grandma Shelle, Papa Tom, and cousin Kay were all on their way back to Mississippi after coming out west for the memorial service for Hillary.

They had been with us for a few days and we were all hoping that this lil one that we hadn't even met yet would make her entrance a little early so that the circle of life could be the final memory for them.


She sure did keep us waiting up until the very morning their plane was to leave I started to get some pretty strong labor pains. I being a first time mom had a few false alarms before this day and so I wanted to be really sure this was it. There was no mistake about it, Emma wanted to enter the world on a day that would bring joy instead of sorrow, laughter instead of tears, and she reminded us all that day that life must go on. Her entrance was grand to say the least, and she was met by so many people in the delivery room that now looking back on it all it brings a tears to my eyes. From her very start she has been a blessing.

Emma Faith is turning 12. She wishes she was turing 21, but thank God her mom has a few more years to catch up with her maturity that has always been way beyond her years.
She is the "other mother" in this family.

She is the great motivator in this house.

I will never forget when she was 5 years old and we signed her up to play soccer. It was the first organized sport that she had been involved in. When she would get on that field she would go after that soccer ball with such determination and vigor that her dad and I were literally floored by her competitive spirit.

She definitely inherited her dad's confidence in self, by that I mean she really does not care what others think about her. When she was little again all her friends dressing up as princesses for Halloween and she was still sporting Gramma Shelle's animals. The final year she was a giraffe a costume so over the top we had to carry around the long neck like she was a show girl.
And now as she enters the last year of pre-teen/childhood she is still as confident as ever. I think I am more nervous than she to enter Jr. high in the fall.

She is so confident.
Sings like there's no tomorrow.
Her eyes are so beautiful that I still find myself staring into them just because I like to look at them.


She is my daughter who is now becoming my friend.

The Book- Jesus For President ,The Movie- Avatar, The Church Bethany UCC,and my thoughts lately

I have been reading another one of Shane Claiborne's books Jesus for President by Chris Haw and Shane. The first book of Shane's that I recently blogged about here a few months back, Irresistible Revolution still seems so fresh in my mind, and has left me haunted in many ways that I am not doing enough to make this world a better place.
This new book I chose to read to stay on that same train of thought( the train that wants to make the world a better place is not an easy train to be on), has done the same thing, but magnified that thought x 1000!

Seriously, I have to say, that this book is even more challenging than the first because it deals so much with politics and how they correlate with being a Christian. Politics have changed and are still changing for me on a daily basis. Honestly, though they are not my full-time job, not even my part-time job for that matter and by that I mean I would consider myself to be the average American voter who only pays attention to things when election years roll around. That is some real, REAL honesty there(so don't be a judger). SO, reading this book which is primarily written by two extreme activists in this regard has made me realize how my ignorance was really bliss! Now that I know what I know after reading this book I can't turn back.

It talks about the violence of wars and their aftermath. What it looks like to be a Christ follower, who if we are truly following in Christs foot-steps we are to love our enemies, do good to those that hurt us, and I am pretty sure He said something about turning the other cheek. He never said, take what you want, when you want it and by all means use force to get it if necessary. Which btw, is pretty much in a nutt-shell the U.S. of A's entire history.
PLEASE,Please, don't take me wrong I am EXTREMELY grateful for this country and although I believe many of our ways are twisted and could use a serious wake-up call, there is also another side of the US that I see, in the faces and stories everyday that are good, but for the sake of what I am internalizing right now I have to say personally I see so many more changes that need to be made, rather than things that would be good if they stayed the same. Hope that makes sense?

I think this book combined with being totally blown away by the new movie Avatar has made me angry with our country and it's history. I hope it's a righteous anger, but all I know is it makes me want to do something, anything to make things better in this country. If you have seen the movie than I hope you get the correlation about taking things by force and how much the US has played a part from it's very origin in doing this very shameful act of injustice.

On top of this book, and that movie there is the new church I have been attending, Bethany United in Seattle or Bethany UCC.
This church if full and I do mean full of WORLD CHANGERS! Like this past Sunday, they had an amazing speaker, Pramila Jayapal, who talked about immigration reform. It was powerful. It was challenging to listen to the stories of immigrants whose rights as human beings are being violated every day in the name of the law. I cried silent tears pretty much the whole time she was talking for many reasons.
And now here tonight my heart is torn.
My eyes of full of tears again for so many reasons.
I am wondering what is my part in all of this?
She said something that I believe sums up what is happening to me, "If you allow yourself to feel fully everyday it is a courageous act. You can't help but become an activist."
I don't allow myself to feel fully everyday. It hurts way too much. I think I am beginning to awaken more feelings about all of this stuff and it scares the hell out of me because I know where this train of thought leads.
Why am I on this train again? Oh yeah, because I have 4 children.
This train of thought is not easy.
It's not for cowards. In fact it's not coward friendly at all, which is what I am to the core.
Like the Lion in the Wizard of Oz, I talk a big game, but I am scared and allow fear to dominate so many of the choices that I make in life. My phlegmatic nature is opposed to being an activist, but it's never too late to change.
I am beginning to find my ROAR though.
I hope that this new voice I have found always speaks
Life instead of Death,
Love instead of Hate,
Mercy instead of Judgement.
Honestly, Oh God I pray, I hope it sounds more and more like a Lamb than A Lion.

Ode to Chloe Nashelle

10 Years ago I asked my mom to watch Emma, my almost 2 year old, while I went to my weekly pre-natal appointment. I left the office happy to report back that things were moving right along, and that my doctor said it could be any day. Little did I know that it would be that night.


I came home to a very happy, very active lil Emma Faith and Grandma Ellen playing on the floor at 803 North Minnesota St. I immediately kicked right back into mom mode and starting playing along with them. Meanwhile, my back started to hurt.

After about an half an hour of my back hurting, I started to get some more pain. I decided to get up off the floor and do some dishes. While doing the dishes and standing upright for about 20 minutes more I started breathing a little heavy. My mom of course having birthed 4 children before, I am sure knew right away what was happening, but I thought everything was fine.

We lived literally right down the street from the hospital and so I wanted to wait until I couldn't wait anymore before going to the hospital. I decided to take a shower just in case.


Meanwhile, Moses came home from work and my mom informed him that "IF you don't get her to the hospital she's going to give birth to that baby right there in the shower" (said in my mother's very bostonian accent that comes out oh so strong when she is nervous, upset, excited.... pretty much a lot) Mo then came knocking on the bathroom door and I guess I had been in there for about a half hour(the warm water just felt really good) and he said, "Well, I guess I will boil some water and get some towels" which I knew was my husbands way of saying, GIRL you better get your butt out of there and to the hospital.

And so off we went. A whole minute down the road. By the time I got to the nursing station I couldn't even check in or say my name. I was in hard labor. The nurses got me to a bed and called my doctor. They said, that baby is coming and the doctor might not make it in time and the worst part, I could not have ANY DRUGS! What? "It's too late for that now!" What? WHAT? Dr. Amy came rushing in, said she had to pour her glass of wine down the drain, boo hoo, and said "Are you ready for this?" Chloe was born from start to finish 45 minutes after I arrived to CTH.

She came in like a tidal wave that swept over us all and now 10 years later this girl still brings such waves of LOVE that it's hard to put it in words.


She is a gem.
She is beautiful.
She is Chloe Nashelle.
She is now in double digits.
Happy Birthday Lo Lo I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!