I don't know if you know this, but I get really excited about words.
Words are my muse.
I love to hear them.
I love to sing them.
I love to speak them.
I love to read them.
And I love when they are sweetly spoken to me.
The other day, I read a phrase in the bible that jumped right out at me.
The words intrinsic worth popped off the page this morning with such excitement it almost made a splash in my coffee.
Does that ever happen to you?
Not necessarily words that literally jump into coffee, but you read something or hear something and it just lingers?
Well I read this little portion of scripture a few days ago;
"Stop regarding man, whose breath [of life] is in his nostrils [for so little time];
in what sense can he be counted as having intrinsic worth. "
And the phrase intrinsic worth got me so all kinds of excited that I tweeted it right then and there so I wouldn't forget it.
I immediately checked the googles for what the true meaning of this phrase might be.
I found it hard to understand in a tangible human way, but incredibly worthy of a description for the Creator of this vast universe.
It made me think and ask questions like what do I find worthy in this life?
Someone asked me a long time ago if you really want to know what matters in your life imagine your house is on fire ... what do you grab to get out as fast as you can, and what would you go back in there for?
Of course everyone who has loved ones in their house would of course say them and their pets first, but then what would it be?
When I think long and hard about that there isn't much I'd come running back inside a burning house for, but I do have a binder of all titles, passports, social security cards, birth certificates that is easy accessible and ready to run out with.
The other stuff in comparison has no real worth except maybe some precious pictures and MY BIBLE.
My bible has countless notes and highlights and love letters in it from others that couldn't be replaced but what makes it intrinsically worthy to me has more to do with who wrote it and the conversations we've been having all these years because of that book.
The whole entire bible is one long love letter to all of God's creation.
Yes, it can be hard to understand sometimes.
Yes, it was written by men.
But it was, and is, and always will be breathed upon and made to come alive by God's own Spirit.
Sometimes when I sit with my big bible (It's big because I chose an Amplified Version of the bible because there are MORE WORDS in it) I feel as though.. no I KNOW that God himself if sitting right there with me.
Whispering sweet nothings ... wait sweet every-things and so much more into my ear.
"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope."
There are no other words so powerful as those that are spoken to the soul from it's creator.
a peace that surpasses all understanding that I've been fortunate enough to experience since I was around 13 years old.
Almost 30 years later since this relationship began I have come to wonder why this awesome gift I was given, I often times take for granted.
I decided that for this season of Lent I don't want to take away something, but rather add a new determined purpose to my life.
With my heart full of so many emotions, so many ambitions, so many out pouring actions, I'm reminded once again to fill my cup, to fill my well first.
I'm going back to the basics of watering my well.
When I reconnect to the rapture of life and fully living it, I'm reminded that my well needs watering.
"And if a desire to serve humanity or to find God comes from a rapturous engagement with life , then our service and our search will bear fruit. But if we try to love or lead, or work or pray, from a dry well, then we will serve a bitter cup to those around us and never really live the life we were given. "
Oh that I would never serve from a bitter, and empty cup.
There is something to be said about people who are so full of joy all the time.
It exudes from their being.
You can feel it when they walk into a room.
It changes the temperature of said room.
The same can be said of a person that walks around with a bitter, angry, and sad heart.
You know it isn't their fault.
Some are grieving a loss that they haven't fully processed yet.
Then there are those that have the victim mentality.
They just can't seem to get past the pain that we all endure in the course of a lifetime.
I will never truly understand why the portions of pain and joy are not poured out equally or fairly in this life.
Still, there are those unique souls who have been given a double portion of pain, and they manage to pour forth joy everywhere they go.
They are like the mythical unicorns in this life.
It takes great effort and determination to move past the pains that a lifetime can serve us.
I think there is a lot of therapy involved in that effort too.
There is no wonder why some people decide to take the turtle approach and just retreat from fully living.
More often than not I think I'm more like a turtle than a unicorn.
To truly love and live a life of love you have to experience pain.
I believe the more you love the more pain you might experience.
Those that have the lion hearts are the ones that know this, and still continue to roar with joy.
Ok so maybe they are a lion unicorn type creature. (wink wink)
I wonder sometimes how those that roar with joy, love, and passion for life, how do they fill their cups so that they don't become bitter from the hard times?
The truth is that every single human that has walked this planet has felt the sting of pain.
Life has more stings than a hive of bumble bees on a hot July day!
But how do we heal those wounds and move forward to go back out and enjoy that warm sunshine of life again?
I don't really know the answers for you to those questions beloved reader, but I can say that for me what helps me to be in forward motion is a direct dial up number to the lover of my soul.
My therapy is found at the feet of a great counselor.
One that never judges me for the times that I retreat to my turtle shell.
In this relationship I find a soothing balm that helps the stings of life fade away.
I recently read that if you break down the word COMFORT it looks like;
Come and Fort.
That's what I do to get built back up again.
I come and fort at the source of living water.
He fills this well to overflowing every time and brings a comfort to my weary soul.
" You can serve your God without being so uptight about it. You can feel the simple rapture of being alive and let that rapture be your North Star. "
My hearts desire is that I would serve from a cup that overflows with joy.
That even in the hard times I would have a song in my heart and an encouraging word for my fellow travelers here.