Wednesday, August 23, 2023

Growing People, Growing Things

Growing People is hard work. 




Growing Things can be hard, but not quite as hard as growing people. 



 

We have had 25 years of growing 4 people in our house and under our care. 

Now, suddenly they are all grown up and have had enough confidence to move out into the world all at their own speed, which I would like to point out... to me feels really fast!



It's surreal, awesome, exciting, scary, strange, and wonderful all at the same time. The launches start gradually, similar to how the growing starts. As fast as they came into the world, now just as fast they have all left this nest. Moses and I are only a few weeks into this empty nest, and I gotta say, it feels like only yesterday we started out on this journey with no IDEA what we were doing, or how quickly it would go. 

The days are long, but the years are short. 



 Just like that the season for growing humans is over. In all those years I never really thought too much about how important the task was, because when you have 4 humans to grow, and they spring up so fast, you don't really have time to think about it, you JUST DO IT!

I remember asking my beloved Grandma once, how she managed raising 5 kids all within a year of each other in birthdays, and she said... I just did it! She was a very wise woman. This simple response, but profound at the same time, made me think about how it is true that so much of parenting is just doing, doing, doing. 




We have too much information out there now. Everyone, now a days has a book about how to, or what to, or why to do this or that, and in reality when it comes to parenting you JUST DO IT!

 Like Nikes slogan, you put your parenting boots, or shoes on and you get in there and DO IT, every DAY!

 After a while it gets a whole lot easier and becomes second nature to be doing 5 things at one time. It is common place to be listening to several tiny humans all at the same time, and without even noticing that you're doing it, you have met all of their needs and then some. 

It truly is a phenomenal accomplishment.



If at this stage in the game of parenting I have earned the right to give any parental advice, I would say put down your phone and just do it. 

By that I mean, stop listening to all those people who don't live in your house and under your roof, and start listening to the little humans right in front of you. Don't get me wrong, parenting advice is a very good thing, but remember it's just advice. Ultimately YOU are the only one who has studied this person from the moment they were so graciously given to you. You are the only one who knows what makes them tick. You are the only one who matters when it comes to them feeling loved and accepted for who they are, and what they want to become. 



I would also say, partnering with the eternal parent who created them helps a whole lot! 

Every hair on their head is known by the creator and every dream in their heart is known to the Creator as well. So, getting in sync with that would be the first place to start. 



Growing People is hard work, but growing Souls that go out into the world, and are a light that shines in some very dark places, well that is ultimate reward for all the hard work. 


It's very similar to growing a garden. You plant a seed and you water the dirt that at first doesn't look like it will be anything significant at all, and then with some sun and more water, maybe some special food something starts to grow. 



As any Gardner knows, you can't stop not even for one day, or you won't get the results that you're after. Gardners don't get vacations. Gardners don't get holidays. They know that if they want the reward of something beautiful they have to keep at it. You have to prune, harvest, and be attentive to what you happen to be growing. You have to learn about soil, and watering, sunlight and shade. 

It's a whole thing. 

Planting a seed isn't hard, but growing something beautiful takes diligence. 

We all know, making humans isn't that hard, (that's the fun part some would say), but growing them... that's a whole other ball game. Like in baseball, my dad says, "You Win some, You Lose some, and Some are rained out. You hope for the best and kiss off the rest!" 



That is what your days of parenting will look like. Some days you will hit it out of the park and other days you will want to take your ball and go home, BUT you can't. You can't ever stop at the role of growing and parenting the humans you've been given. 

When the season is over for you and they move out from your 24/7 care and watchful eye, you will be in awe of it all. You will get the reward of knowing that you SHOWED UP every day, without fail. You will (if you have done it right ) have built-in besties now, that will make your heart explode with JOY as you watch them walk into the season you feel like YOU just started 2.5 seconds ago. 

Wonderful, Beautiful, LIFE !!!



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