Balance

When I look at this picture all I can think of is one word;

Balance.

Ok maybe I was thinking of one word and one phrase; the word Balance mostly, but then also

                                                     THERE'S A TRAIN COMING!!

If a pictures really worth a thousand words then I would say this picture is the poster child for that quote. Also my eldest child, the one photographed here, the one who made me a mom for the first time... I'm pretty sure she would be the poster child for the world Balance. I have always said of Emma Faith, that she has the best self management skills I have ever seen. The kid got up in Jr. High early so she could watch the morning news.  She would sit with her cup of coffee and  find out what the weather was going to be for the day and dress accordingly. Who does that? I mean I'm sure some of that early morning rising came because she wanted to have a cup of coffee in the quiet before her siblings woke up, but still it was a very impressive, balanced thing to do for a young lady of 11 or 12.

Balance.

When observing this photo shoot there were so many thoughts and emotions running through my brain. At this particular captured moment I was thinking...

In a matter of seconds she could've lost her balance and toppled over into the Truckee River and that would of been the end of this amazing photo shoot. The Lemaire Photo crew could've lost their balance and with very expensive cameras in hand, tragedy would ensue. Thank God that isn't what happened. They all kept their balance.

Balance.

But then the train entered this beautiful picture and I started to think about the train of life that John Mayer sings about in his song; STOP THIS TRAIN.

I'm sure if she was ever going to get distracted and fall off that chair it would've been when the big, loud train came barreling by, but she kept on being focused. The photography team kept their cool as I stood with Emma's fan following (Grandma, and Aunties) off on the sidelines and prayed for more balance and more focus.
And I thought about how I CAN'T no matter how hard I try, I can't stop this train that is coming.
The train that ushers my oldest child into adulthood is going to be here this May and I can either get on board or stand by on the sidelines trying to figure out how to make it all stop.

Balance.

It is so very easy in this life to get off balance. To let the loud trains that come as quite a surprise get you rattled and off your focus or determined purpose. I think that balance and purpose go hand in hand though. When you know your purpose in this life it takes more than a train or semi truck or tornado or .... Just about anything else under the sun to get you off track.
Her purpose and the Lemaire Photography crews purpose was to get some really awesome photos and NOT fall in the Truckee River.
My purpose for quite some time ... well almost 18 years now has been to be a good mom to 4 incredible people.
Just because one of those peoples will soon be 18 and technically a legal adult doesn't mean my role as mom is over.
It's never really over.

Balance.

Often times though it isn't the loud trains in life that get us off balance it's the little suttle things that creep in and get bigger and bigger and before you know it you've lost your balance. You've let something else consume all your time, energy and passion and when you turn around you traveled down a road you never intended to be on.
I want to stay on the purposeful roads that God has given me in this life and I want to get on board the trains of life and not buck the system of Father Time.

Balance.

In order to do this I'm learning. I'm paying very close attention to those that have gone before me. This is what I'm learning; the older I get to truly maintain balance in my life I have to let go of some things. I just can't possibly "do it all" and stay balanced. It's hard to let go. In fact I'd venture to say it's one of the hardest life lessons that I'm still learning. 

Balance. 

In regards to parenting it is THE hardest lesson to learn I'm convinced. There's a very good reason that the saying "if you love something let it go" is well known and speaks truth. It's because in order for our children to truly grow into healthly balanced young adults we have to let go of SO much. If we don't they rebel. It's not healthy to tighten the grip of control over our children right before they are expected to head out into the world and face decisions that will require them to use the only skill set they have been given. They will need to balance;  school, work, relationships, and God knows the social media department of life will need some extra hard core balance. 

Balance.

We let go of expectations and preconceived notions.
So that they can forge their own path completely and utterly different than our own.

We let go of their physical prescense always being there as they drive away from us.
So that they will feel the difference of being surrounded and supported versus being alone and quiet.

We let go of our hopes and dreams as they come up with their own.

Balance.

I'm finding that in order to keep a balance healthy relationship with my oldest daughter I have to let her go, and although my mom warned me that this would absolutely be the hardest part of parenting... I never thought that it would THIS hard. 

"Letting go helps us to live in a more peaceful state of mind and helps restore balance. It allows others to be responsible for themselves and for us to take our hands off situations that do not belong to us. This frees us from unnessary stress."

So here's to letting go, getting on board, and finding balance in it all!

The Rhythms of Life

Rhythm, I'm not talking about the musical kind like keeping the beat of a song or having moves to a dance. There is a rhythm to this life, as opposed to the musical rhythm.

Everyone has this kind of rhythm as opposed to musical rhythm which everyone does NOT have. 
 Life Rhythms are the soft quiet way we go about our day, week, month year.
Sometimes the rhythms of life can go by so quietly that we forget to look up and see how the world has changed. Other times, our lives rhythm can be hi-jacked by tragedy and we never really find that beat again. And still other times we can take on someone else's life rhythms and try to adopt them as our own, all the while we are dying inside.

The rhythm of a life looks different for everyone and takes everyone a certain amount of time to find what their true rhythm is. Some are upbeat and always on the go and this feeds their soul. Others life rhythm is much slower and requires much more down time.
I have realized after 40 years on this planet that mine is of the latter group.
Although I do ALOT I don't function well in that  "ALOT" category or rhythm section if you will. It has taken me many years to realize this and to be ok with it.  It's ok now for me to know that every week I need at least two days to regroup as opposed to the one day of Sabbath that every person on the planet really needs, but often denies themselves.
Finding your life's rhythm is somehow tied into finding your true authentic self. Some people never truly find that person that they were always intended to be. I believe finding your true self and life rhythm comes from slowing down long enough to hear the sound, the beat of your heart. Asking yourself questions like;
What makes my heart sing?
That's a saying that my mom has said so many times I can almost hear her saying it now with her east coast accent. It's a good questions because it opens up all kinds of other answers. What makes your heart sing can sometimes often lead you to your rhythm of life.
"When all the world appears to be in a tumult, and nature itself is feeling the assault of climate change, the seasons retain their essential rhythm. Yes, fall gives us a premonition of winter, but then, winter, will be forced to relent, once again, to the new beginnings of soft greens, longer light, and the sweet air of spring."

Madeleine M. Kunin

I want to retain my essential God given rhythm no matter what the seasons of change may bring, and the only way I know how to do that is to check back in again and again with the rhythm maker. 

The season changer.

The life giver.

The conductor if you will.

And of course by now your wondering what the point was to this lil here blog... Well I really just needed more Gloria Estefan in my life!
BIG SMILE

Happy October!