High School Football Games As The Adult

Last Friday night we went to the first High School football game in our town.  My daughter Emma is now in High School and our team happened to be playing against a neighboring team that one of my friends sons plays for. It was a good chance to go spy on my teenager.  Wait. Did I say that out loud?  I mean it was a good chance to catch up with my friend. That's my girl Em on the left, the one I didn't spy on.

It felt very strange to be there as an older, wiser(ok that's a stretch I know), parent versus well... anything else. When I stopped to think about why it was strange I came up with a list. I like lists. Do you like lists? I like David Letterman because he likes lists. So in true David Letterman style these are my  Top 10 reasons why High School Football games CAN be strange for adults to go to. 10. As a child..ahem.. I mean mature teen, the field, the people, the experience seemed larger than life. Now as a grown adult the field seems smaller, the kids seem younger, and the crowd well... For real. When did the experience become so teeny tiny ? So inconsequential to everyday life? 9. You keep thinking how did I get here? I mean I know how I got there I drove, but how did I become the grown up. The one who made all these kids who are now playing out on that football field. Well, I didn't make all those kids out there, sheesh that would be some kinda Floozy, but you know what I mean. 8.  I don't ever remember bleachers being a problem for my derriere before. The seats are not made for the ahem.. middle aged. 7. The noise level seems a bit louder and you think, boy those kiddos are going to be hoarse tomorrow. Why DO I THINK LIKE THIS? When did this happen? 6. The beverages well...I kept looking for a nice glass of Vino, but then I remembered where I was.  5. The people in the stands that are your peers look old as hell, and you feel like SURELY I am in the wrong peer group. 4. Instead of wishing the whole night that you will see some action after the game(I never did this btw, purely in here for dramatic affect) as well as during, you hope that all the players will play safe and get home nice and safe, and tuck into bed nice and safe, and did I mention nice? And did I mention safe? 3. Cheerleaders skirts - When did they get so damn short? They keep getting shorter and becoming more of a distraction. They become the bane of your existence, for a whole different reason when you are the mother of two young boys. 
2. The high school football players are no longer the Hotty Pit Totties you remember them to be. They are now the pimply little teens that you remember as babies. Whose diapers you used to change and who you used to watch crawl around on the floor. They are just babies in your mind. Still babies!!
1. AND the number one reason that A High School Football game is a strange event is that High School is a planet that you no longer dwell on. You are now worlds away from it and it all feels like an Alien invasion now. Vaguely familiar and at the same time a whole galaxy away.
So needless to say,  I haven't been to a High School Football game in are really long time. A really, really, really.. really Long time. And going as an adult, and as a parent is whole different ball game entirely.
Literally, and figuratively.